A man in Louisiana was arrested after police arrived at his home in response to a purported assault. The man, cops say, had called 911 to claim that he had been “stabbed on the head by an axe.”
When officers arrived at the man’s West Monroe home, they determined that he was not suffering from any axe wounds (he did have a fairly nasty papercut and those can be really painful). Cops did, however, spot in plain view on a night stand a open brown paper containing approximately 1 gram of suspected methamphetamine.
According to the man, a ghost may have put it there.
Is it not patently obvious what is happening here: this poor man is being haunted by an apparition that not only stabs him on the head with an axe, but also plants drugs and drug paraphernalia in his home. I also suspect that troublemaking ghost had something to do with that nasty paper cut.
“It’s ridiculous,” one of the responding officers commented, “you can’t stab someone with an axe; you chop someone with an axe. You can pretty much hack a person to bits if you have a good axe…all in all this was a disappointing crime scene.”
Quizzed by cops, the man said that “a ghost or intruders” planted the drugs before climbing out a bedroom window. This claim, investigators determined, “was not accurate.”
“Climbing out windows is not normal modus operandi for ghosts,” the officer said, “they tend walk through walls or disappear into an ethereal mist…this was a very disappointing crime scene.”
The man was charged with narcotics possession and making a false report to police.
The ghost has yet to be located, but the police are still looking.