Tooth Fairy Jailed
North East, Pennsylvania–A man was jailed in the town of North East, Pennsylvania after being arrested for suspicious behavior and what the responding officer referred to as, prowling around like weirdo.
The man who has been identified as a Mr. T. Fairy was allegedly trying to gain entry to the residence of the Smith family. “He claims to have had business there,” the arresting officer said.
The man was discovered carrying a satchel of silver dollars and what appeared to be a bag filled with children’s teeth. “A bag of children’s teeth,” said the officer. “How sinister is that?”
The man claims to be the famed Tooth Fairy, but the police have their doubts. “I imagined the Tooth Fairy to be less muscular than this guy, and definitely less tattooed,” one officer commented.
“Everybody just assumes the Tooth Fairy is some petite little woman,” Mr. Fairy said, “but that’s just sexist.”
Investigation has uncovered that little Ronnie Smith had lost a tooth earlier that day when on a dare he tried to eat a brick. “Ronnie is pretty stupid,” his father confirmed.
Adding intrigue to the situation and weight to the man’s story, he was discovered to have wings. “We were fingerprinting him when all of a sudden these wings go fluttering up behind him,” the processing officer said, “that doesn’t normally happen.”
Mr. Fairy is being charged with trespassing and with a little used statute involving activity deemed to be more than a little icky.
“Well, the tooth will come out in the end,” Mr. Fairy said with a chuckle.
Little Ronnie’s lost tooth remains under his pillow, waiting for the Tooth Fairy to make bail.
What do you suppose the tooth fairy does with all those teeth?
LikeLike
I can think of nothing that isn’t disturbing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
He’s not the Tooth Fairy, obviously. As we learned in Hogfather, the job is subcontracted, so at best he’s a tooth fairy. Or he might just be a thug who’s stealing kids’ teeth for nefarious reasons… but the wings sort of point to the former.
LikeLike
Next you’ll say there’s no Santa Clause.
LikeLike
That’s just crazy talk. Santa fills the stockings, right? So if you say you don’t believe in Santa, you don’t get presents in your stocking.
LikeLike
I get coal.
LikeLike
I am sorry to report that it seems that someone already stole your post idea and made it into a movie starring Dwayne Johnson.
LikeLike
He also stole the moniker “The Rock” from me.
LikeLike