the blog that made the pope laugh so hard he peed himself.

Archive for the day “March 7, 2017”

Loud-mouthed Idiots–Hush Now

loud mouth

“Act just like me–I’m cool.”

I have a quick message for all the fun loving people loud-mouthed idiots out there who think I should behave the way they do.

Stop It!

Just because you want dance on a table, juggling shot glasses, butchering the lyrics to Love Shack at the top of your lungs, as your testicles dangle from your pants, doesn’t mean that I also want to do that.

I don’t want to see that happening.

I don’t want to be within the proximity of that happening.

I don’t even want the knowledge of that ever occurring.

I assume as a male of the species you have testicles–I don’t need proof.

I know what’s in my own mind.

If I say I don’t want to dance–I don’t want to dance.

If I say I don’t want to pound shots of tequila–I don’t want to pound shots of tequila. I know you think it’s not a party until you’ve vomited on someone’s shoes, but not everyone appreciates having to clean chunks out of their shoelaces.

And for the love of all that is good and merciful, stop trying to make me sing karaoke. We defeated Japan in World War II and they gave us karaoke–let’s just call it even.

And why do we excuse boorish behavior based on the fact that it’s habitual.

If a person acts like a jerk once or twice, he’s being a jerk. However, if a person has a pattern of acting like a jerk it’s simply sloughed off as a personality trait.

If Ron Smith acts like a giant prick today–then Ron Smith is being a giant prick.

But if Ron Smith acts like a giant prick on a daily basis, multiple times a day–then that’s just Ron being Ron.


Ron Smith is a giant prick! Period!

It’s like saying, sure Theodore Bundy was kidnapper, rapist, necrophile who confessed to murdering over thirty young women, but that was just Ted being Ted.

Note: Ron Smith is simply a generic name I chose and not the Ron Smith that I know personally. The fact that the Ron Smith I know personally, is a giant prick, is just a coincidence.

And stop telling me you’re just “keeping it real.”

You’re really a giant loud-mouthed prick.

Thank you for allowing me to get that off me chest. I feel much better now.hush now


Post Navigation

%d bloggers like this: