The Top Ten Reasons People Unfollow This Blog
The medication has finally begun to work.
The mimes are beginning to win their battle against me.
The overwhelming shame, and the constant hassle of having to delete their browser history has become too much.
This blog causes cancer in lab rats. (It kills honey badgers outright.)
This blog was hacked by the North Korean government following an unfortunate comment concerning Kim Jong Un’s potato-faced head. (He has a potato-faced head.)
Internet privileges have been revoked in the violent offenders wing of Attica. (Evidently this blog is considered currency in maximum security prisons.)
An unexpected backlash after the post entitled: Charles Manson: not such a bad guy.
As a result of my repeatedly implying in this blog that my aunts are witches, they gathered to vehemently deny those charges…then they put a hex on this blog.
People seem to be really pissed off that I shot that lion in Africa.
Note: honestly, I’m a little bit worried this joke will piss people off.
The sudden and jarring realization people have as they’re reading this blog: I’m worth more.