idiotprufs

Illegal in 38 states–frowned upon in the rest.

Elizabeth Gomez: Inappropriate Sentiments for Greeting Cards

I find all of these to be completely appropriate.

Drinkers with Writing Problems

  1. Birthday: It’s Your Birthday…I slept with your grandmother. We’re getting married.

  2. I’m Sorry: For sleeping with your grandmother, marrying her, and stealing away your inheritance. Love from Cabo!

  3. Anniversary: Happy Anniversary to the Man I Love…I hope my husband never finds out. LOL!

  4. Happy Easter: Praise be to the Lord, He has Risen…ALL LAMBS SHOULD DIE! Then sprinkle with rosemary and thyme for a delicious dinner celebrating Christ.

  5. Congratulations: You’ve graduated high school!…Now, try to get through college without a cocaine addiction.

  6. Thank You: Thank You…for giving me something that will be in next month’s yard sale.

  7. New Baby: God has blessed you with a baby…Let’s hope your wife doesn’t drown it.

  8. Get Well Soon: May God bless you with a speedy recovery…but then I hope you get hit by a car when you leave the hospital because I love watching you suffer.

  9. Thinking of You: I’ve been thinking of…

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