It Was an Act of God?
It’s happened to everyone hasn’t it? Throughout the course of your life at some point or another you are going to set somebody’s carpet on fire. It shouldn’t be a big deal. Well, evidently it is a big deal, at least that’s what some of us have learned.
There were a few lessons learn by the great carpet fire:
- The average household vacuüm cleaner was not designed to pick up paperclips.
- Attempting to pick up paperclips with an average household vacuüm cleaner might cause it to explode.
- When the vacuüm cleaner you’re using begins to make a high-pitched whining sound, don’t ignore it, it’s about to explode.
- An exploding vacuüm cleaner sends a thick cloud of smoke and dust into the air like a mini-volcano.
- Commenting to the vacuüm cleaner’s owner that it looked really cool when it exploded, like a mini-volcano, does not help the situation.
- An exploding vacuüm cleaner creates an enormous mess while simultaneously removing your ability to clean up that enormous mess.
- An exploding vacuüm cleaner might also burst into flames.
- A burning vacuüm cleaner will probably set the carpet on fire.
- A carpet fire will probably set off the smoke alarm.
- Smoke alarms are obnoxiously loud.
- A blaring smoke alarm will bring the vacuüm cleaners owner running into the room.
- A contentious conversation might result.
Owner: Why is the smoke alarm going off?
Firestarter: Probably because of all the smoke that’s in the room.
Owner: Why is the room full of smoke?
Firestarter: It probably came from the carpet fire.
Owner: Why is the carpet on fire?
Firestarter: It spread from the vacuüm cleaner.
Owner: Why is the vacuüm cleaner on fire?
Firestarter: Act of God?
There was one more imporant lesson learned: the phrase “some day we’ll look back at this and laugh” does not always apply.